About Me

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A child of Italian immigrants, born and bred in Australia. At 24 I purchased my first apartment in the city of Melbourne. Then I sailed around the world, on a record breaking, fast ship. I was the unqualified and only cook. I met my true love, though I didn't know it at the time. He didn't even get a kiss, before I continued my travels. In-between being directionless, I worked and educated myself to become a Nurse, Reflexologist, Reiki Master, Colonic hydrotherapist, and a First Aid and Occupational Health and Safety Trainer. Just as I was finding my feet in a self made career of sorts, he (my love) found me on facebook, 11 years after we had last seen each other. This time he knew how to get what he wanted. I call him The Captain on this blog. In May 2010 I moved to Denmark and also gained two more bonus children. It's the best decision I've ever made. I have always followed my heart, even the times it was beating out of tune, magic lies in mistakes too. Amongst other things, this is a love story.

24 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life - Let's call him Ulysses.



I still have the love letters Ulysses wrote to me. I remember thinking I'd keep them as proof that I had at least once in my life, been loved.

He looked like James Dean, complete with Levis and white t-shirt.

There was a huge age difference between us. He was also a Dad with full custody of his two children.

I felt safe, happy too, but like I was just biding my time. We were together almost 3 years but he was a shift worker and I spent most of time working away at sea, month on and month off, with lots of travelling in-between.

He was right about our age difference in the end. I was in my early twenties and my desire for freedom was stronger than my desire for love. I wanted to love him more. When I realised I couldn't, I knew I'd cause more pain if I stayed.

image courtesy of clker.com

Breaking up with him was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make in my life.  Leaving his young children and not explaining why was harder... I didn't fully understand why at the time.

Almost 20 years later, through the magic of facebook, I caught up with him and his children again. He's doing mighty fine. His son is a Dad now. His curious little girl is in her early twenties now.

I spent time catching up with her on Skype. We talked about the stray-cat I found that became their much loved family member for many years. We talked like women who had grown up together, or family members that hadn't seen each other in decades. It was a proud moment when she said the love we had shared was lasting.

I recall many woken nights spent wondering if I had made the right decision to leave him. The pull drawing me back towards him was a difficult force to resist.

Ulysses was a warrior in my mind, strong, dependable, a great Dad and a humble bloke. Just not my bloke.

I knew the journey could have been a good one, but the destination wasn't a place I could picture us being together.

Have you ever caught a train and realised you were on the wrong line?  Did you hit the emergency brakes or take in the view for a while?




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23 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life - Let's call it...The Truth #atozchallenge






Ever noticed when kids tell the biggest lies? They don't want to get in trouble, they want people to believe they are smarter or stronger than they really are, or that their life is fabulous when it's full of fear.

They want to be just like their parents (and their parents know everything). It seems logical to act as if you just know everything too. As children, lack of knowledge feels more like a weakness than an opportunity to learn something new.

There is evidence to suggest the more intelligent a child is the better they lie.  Perhaps Pinocchio is a better role model than we ever suspected.  I ask children if their story is made up, real or both. I tell them I love listening to all types of stories.  Fairytales are real to very young children. They don't know the difference between fact and fiction. (Neither do some sociopaths - not all lies are precious.)

clkr.com
I have a special relationship with Truth, all seekers do. I made a conscious decision to commit to telling the truth at the age of 18.  It took me a few years to break the habit of lying... I constantly would re-start sentences with - 'let me start again that was a complete lie.'

The most incredible thing occurred, people stopped believing me when I told the truth. I never had people question my lies, yet my truth was questioned all the time.  It seems I only told believable lies but my life stories were unbelievable...

It wasn't easy to tell the whole truth, sometimes it's still hard - especially when it's something you know will cause pain. Especially, if it's something you don't want to admit to yourself.  Especially, when you have done something wrong.

The truth is I can't be bothered writing much more about Truth. Like most things in life when you seek it - you will find it (and/or it finds you.)

My personal motto: Be true to yourself and honest to everyone else.

Has finding out the truth about someone's lies ever really shocked you?



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22 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life - Lets call him Sherlock. #atozchallenge





Sherlock and I were workmates. We became friends. I didn't want to fall in love with him. I was convinced my heart still belonged to the Rooster. I have never fooled anyone, quite as well as I have fooled myself.

Unlike the Rooster, Sherlock was generous with his time and attention. He worked on the road, I was in charge of arranging his jobs. I lived close to the office. He began to visit during his breaks. It was convenient. He had a strong jaw and solid stature. We were both single. Well, technically he wasn't in a committed relationship.

He had two women in his life. One he couldn't let go of, and one he wanted to hold onto. They were unaware of each other, or that he chased every other woman he came into contact with.

clkr.com

We promised each other not to develop any strong feelings towards each other. Just hang out, morning coffees, drinks after work, fun. This is how I developed my rule of three. Whether it's a relationship, drinks or a kiss - after the third time, something changes.  Before you make your third move consider the consequences.

Here's a poem, inspired by Sherlock circa early 90's.

Two feet on the ground
your head in the air.
Searching for something
that will never be there.

You go out with strangers
and stay out till late.
Skull a few lagers
then call 'em your mates.

Lend a few promises.
Repeat a few lies.
Create misdemeanours
for the sake of no ties.

The journey to self
is hard for a while.
Start with the truth 
and feel your self smile.

It's no fun to be loved,
if love can't be seen.
Accept who you are, 
and what you have been.


Have you ever fooled yourself into loving the wrong person, at the wrong time, for all the wrong reasons?



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21 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life - Reflexology. #atozchallenge



Happy feet. Happy people.

There are points on the feet that relate to the whole body. They are called reflexes. Reflexology is the study of those reflexes

The first time I tried Reflexology I didn't get excited but I was impressed that the Reflexologist could tell I had back trouble and hormonal issues, just from touching my feet.

I never saw her again, but I decided I wanted to know what she knew.

A step in the right direction.

I eventually enrolled at the Australian School of Reflexology and Relaxation. In 2003 I won Student of the year and the Trevor Steele memorial award. Since then I have worked with both longterm and short-term clients, sometimes as little as a few minutes.

I can tell a lot from your feet and hands.

The problem(s) with Reflexology.


MRI scans have shown the optical nerve light up when the eye reflex is worked, but there is no exacting science that proves there is a link between the point on your foot to the organ we say it is.

The other huge problem is there is no definitive map of the feet. They vary as much as the humans that produce them. Though, they are similar in sections. The toes generally represent the head, the balls are the upper torso, the arch - mid torso and the heels map the pelvis.  The left foot is the left side of the body. Right foot, right side. But our brain controls the opposite side of the body so I question this, at least for the brain reflex.



We disagree about firm pressure, gentle pressure or intuiting client needs. Sequences differ, as do the descriptions of how they work and what they are capable of.

There isn't enough research.

There's also the placebo effect to consider.

It doesn't alway fix what you want it to, sometimes it doesn't seem to work at all.

Perhaps the biggest problem is that a lot of people don't love their feet.

What I love about Reflexology is:


It gives me a reason to lay my hands on people, soul to sole.

In the beginning I keep an eye on the time. I treat both feet wholly and equally from top to bottom. I determine the primary reason for the visit and adapt a plan to suit it. We discover areas of tension and points that are sensitive or painful together. I let the feet tell their story. Every pair of feet have a story.

If your curious I explain as much as I can. Most of the time clients fall asleep, so I wait. I want it to be therapeutic and feel good. I compare the before and after of the feet and the way you walk and talk. I ask that you to do the same.

It's a complimentary medicine.  I've seen it reduce swelling, pain, asthma attacks and the heart rates of mothers-to-be and their unborn children. I've seen it improve sleep patterns, blood pressure and bowel movements. I know therapists who have built successful clinics treating allergies, childhood bedwetting and hormonal imbalance/fertility problems. Time and time again I've seen it reduce stress.

Positive research has shown the benefits of it's use in cancer treatment and palliative care.

It is an ancient therapy and both a science and an art.

Even if you don't like your feet, it feels good.  Just like pedicures or foot baths feel good. Only better.

I found it at a time in my life when my head and heart were to messed up to make any sense of the world around me. It grounded me.

My pudgy, curled up, ugly toes lengthened and became beautiful. Seriously I went up a shoe size.

Have you ever tried Reflexology? Are you a foot lover or hater?



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Nurture your soles. Nurture your soul (or at least have a foot bath.)


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19 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life... Quiet I'm reading. #atozchallenge.






"I don't care much for reading" quipped my 11 year old bonus child.
clkr.com 

 "How could you not like reading?" questioned my 10 year old God child.  "I've been to India, outer space, happy, terrified and every other emotion. I get to time-travel, meet people from all over the world and learn all sorts of stuff just by opening a book. I mean how could you not love books?"


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Confessions of a non-literary book worm.


Bonus child enjoys reading now, but only the allotted 1/2 hour his parents make him do every day. Sometimes he forgets to ask me the time. One minute less is never an option. Over 30 minutes and I stop counting... every adventure filled extra minute.

I have devoured books since I was a child.  I often got into trouble for reading too much.  I would hide in the dunny (people tend to leave you alone when you're in there). I would use a torch under the blankets in bed and stay up all night just to read another page... the end of the chapter... until the battery went flat.

I used to hide novels behind my text books, and sneak in a few pages during class.

Clkr.com


I download lots of free e-books to the Kindle app on my phone. Buying books is off the budget for now. There's not a huge range of English novels buried in Danish libraries. I promise I will get better at leaving reviews. I have sent email's or private messages to the authors before and have always been pleasantly surprised when they respond.

I try to analyse what's going on in the head/heart of every author I read.

I am not a grammar nazi. I am more impressed with people that can speak two or more languages with slightly off grammar, than a perfectionist in one language - Just because you can't get your apostrophes in the right places doesn't mean you don't have an interesting story to tell.

My biggest confession: I rarely remember the names of authors or titles of their books. I can't even think of one book immediately, where I remember both. Who wrote Wuthering Heights? What was the title of my favourite David Malouf novel? Was Tom Sawyer the name of the novel or the character...?  Somewhere in my heart and dendrites each story resides.

(Didn't Einstein say he refused to remember anything he could look up in a book?)



Is it a book worm? No. It's a baby dendrite getting longer with every new tale.
Image courtesy of www.clkr.com



Have you got any book-worm confessions?





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17 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life. Let's call him....Peridot. #atozchallenge


It started in the Spring of '89.  Peri was 18, well travelled, tall and handsome. He had no concept of jealousy.  He was chivalrous, spontaneous and a bird lover.

He took me places I'd never been. The ballet, faraway mountains and the depths of my imagination. When we ate breakfast at Melbourne's fanciest venue, the Hyatt on Collins, his eyes sparkled while Edith Piafs Non, ne je regrette rien crackled over the speakers. He wanted to impress me. I remember thinking it was weird he liked opera! We were an unlikely pair.

In a time when a landline was the only form of communication, I planned chance meetings. I waited for the phone to ring. Checked the dial tone when it didn't, and tried to think of good reasons to call him. I practiced sounding genuine.

Fate bought us together - over and over again.  Destiny, and his lust for walkabouts, kept tearing us apart. He came in and out of my life like a proverbial yo-yo, oddly that's what he used to call me. Our relationship status was 'if you love someone let them free,' when they come back they're yours, but only for short bursts of intense drama"



It was a long-distance, drawn out relationship. For years I dreamt him beside me and woke with empty arms. It became an obsession that manifested into an A-grade addiction. It spawned journals, poetry and lyrics to unfinished rock ballads.

It was all 9 planets aligned, love at first sight, don't tell me it's not true love, I'll always love you, no-one understands our love, I want you to be a mountain, you'd rather be a river, cliche after cliche, unrequited love.  Neither of us found what we were looking for.

Letting go was the lesson. Cry me a waterfall, but the year finally came when I couldn't cry anymore. I let go of the fantasy.

Peri taught me that my words affected other people, in ways I couldn't predict. Emotions didn't exclusively belong to women. Men feel too.

Have you ever invested all your emotions into one person? Fallen in love with someone you thought was an Eagle (partner for life) but turned out to be more of a Rooster?


Image courtesy of free-graphics.com
Cock-a-doodle-do
26 Greatest loves of my live
#atozchallenge


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26 loves of my life - Let's call him...Oh my Odin. #atozchallenge

  

AC WARNING - THE CONTENTS OF THIS POST MAY REQUIRE AN ADULT CONTENT WARNING. According to the 'Blogging from the A to Z challenge' guidelines, 

The only clues I have as to why are because:

a) It was incredibly difficult for me to tell the story the way I wanted to tell it.
b) No adult ever discussed this with me when I was young. 


The Big 'O' - don't say I didn't warn you 


Here's a wee bit of smut for you.

It was quite accidental. At least I wasn't expecting it.

Odin (a teenage boy not the Norse God) touched me. I was fully dressed but something oscillated  deep inside. I may have gasped, but kept a straight face. I needed to get home. I didn't tell him why. I've rarely told anyone. After dinner, no arguments, I went straight to bed. I touched the same spot and to my wonder it happened again.

*The next lines are just science so I'm assuming they're AC safe*

I've since learned that women are the only living beings that have an organ designed purely for pleasure.

Only women.

Pure. Pleasure.

It's only recently been thoroughly researched and it's much bigger than I ever imagined. It deserves a lot more attention.

*Don't click the play button if you think you might be offended by a lesson in female anatomy - but it's fascinating, and only good can come out of it*


Betty Dodson educates us on the most underestimated female organ...


Since that day with Odin, I done some research of my own. It's important to experiment, communicate and teach if you're after satisfaction. Full stimulation releases specific hormones that improve emotional, physical and mental health... and Oh my Odin it feels good.

*If you averted your eyes back there - Your pretty safe from here*

There is a big difference between sacred and secret. In some parts of the world Aunties and Uncles are given the role of educating youth about the pleasures of being an adult. Sounds better than a random teenage boy and a neighbours hidden videos to me.

Apart from centuries of repression, why do you think the female anatomy has been a long and well kept secret?

Smut really is the wrong word. Women have an organ designed purely for pleasure. Is it any wonder that I have never met a woman that wished she was anything else. There is nothing smutty about that. Right?


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It might feel like little butterflies or a powerful tremor - but have you ever felt a shift in your body when you've looked at, thought about or touched someone you're attracted to for the first time?

Do you feel uncomfortable talking or writing about intimacy?



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16 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life. Let's call it... Nature #atozchallenge





From tiny flowers



To towering tree's that whose branches attack 




Sunsets that bring forth the chill of night.





The Moon shedding her light,


Or travelling 




like a headache




across the sky.




Sunrises that hurt my eyes




Baby birds learning to find their way home


Colourful lovers that take a bite out of every pear



Questionable coastlines.


Perfect potatoes 



and rocks that smile, only after it rains... 





Nurture yourself
Nurture nature.



There is no turning back the clock... hang on a second.



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15 April 2014

26 great loves of my life- Let's call her...Ma. #atozchallenge





My Mama taught me:


www.clker.com

"If you're bored you're boring."


So I climbed trees and read lots of stories.

"Never hate a family because of one person."


So I try to understand each story.

"Nothing happens if you do nothing."


So I follow my heart. 



Love for Her, is inevitable. 


What are some pearls of wisdom your Mother taught you.


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13 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life... Let's call it a Love song. #atozchallenge



I was never a huge fan of love songs. I considered them to be the mid-day soap-operas of music.

Then someone wrote a love song about me, for me, or because of me... He tells that part of the story better.

He was a  super cool neighbour, who became one of my best friends. More times than I can remember he would barge into my apartment, guitar and fresh lyrics in hand.

After he met The Captain he went home and wrote our song.

Here's the acoustic version.



Here's the lyrics:
Can you be my lover? - by Ben Jackson

Take it to the limit
Give me the time of my life
Show me what your feeling
Love is strong all through the night

Save me like an Angel
Broken in two and I lose my mind
Save me like an Angel
Never know what we'll find

I don't want to be
The last one standing here.
I don't want to be
wondering why

Can you be my lover?
Hearts will break if I have no other
Can you be my lover?
No more games at night

Oh the sun will rise again
Dreaming of yesterday
The moon will wait in silence
Lost in clouds far away

You know that I won't fall
You're all that I ever needed
Time is not a reason
Just the way things have proceeded.

Here's the full band version recorded live at the Gershwin room in St Kilda, Melbourne. I love the percussion at the end.




Here's another song I love... Down Came the Rain - the original studio recording with Russell Morris can be heard at Reverb Nation  - while your there you might also enjoy 'Dirty dirty disco', 'Facespace', 'Catch me if you can', and a haunting rendition of 'Angel in white.'

...or you can listen to a live recording here.






You can find him at Ben Jackson's Facebook page

For some of his DJ sets go to Soundcloud.

He's come a long way since 2008. Now he runs his own touring company for local and international acts too - HayJack touring

The biggest change since 2008 is how many love songs I actually enjoy listening to now.

Has anyone written a song, story or poem about you? What's your favourite love song.



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12 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life... Let's call him Ken. #atozchallenge




Back to year eight in high school (13 years old) . By this stage I knew exactly why Ken wanted to meet me after school behind the library. I couldn't wait for the bell to ring.


Public domain vectors

He had perfect teeth and a beautiful smile. He was about the same height as me. We met every afternoon and perfected the art of breathing through our nostrils, for as long as possible. After a week or so his Mum started getting concerned about why her son was coming home later every day. 

Occasionally someone would come to his rescue and let him know she was out looking for him. He would try to make it home before she did. 

We had to cool it off for a bit. Every lunch time I waited for him to finish playing soccer and hoped he'd be able to meet up after school - all too willing. One night I wrote him a letter. I snuck out after dinner and rode my bike to his house to hand deliver it. 



The next day he was mad at me for getting him in trouble. His mum opened the letter before he did.  He never even got to read it. When she found out I wasn't even Greek, she started waiting at the gates for him every afternoon. I was furious at the injustice of her racism, invasion of our privacy and that he would never know what was in the letter. I was accused and blamed for something beautiful, turning ugly. I felt so childish. In our house nobody was allowed to open other peoples mail.

He forgave me but kept his word to his mother. A few of the greek girls thought he was free game after that. I'm pretty sure he just wanted to keep kissing whoever got there first.

Relationships were starting to get complicated.

Have you ever failed to gain approval, or had your heart broken by a third party?


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11 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life... Let's call him Jeremiah. #atozchallenge




Before mobile phones and email addresses, Jeremiah and I agreed that if we could keep in contact for 10 years we would be friends for life.

On our 10th anniversary we reminisced about:


- Letter writing and a friendship that spanned continents and lots of different addresses.

- Sharing and learning from each others relationship highs and heartbreaking lows.

- The dream I had of Jeremiah hurting his legs the night he fell down the stairs.

- Meeting his German wife, in India...and the day I was 'best man' at their wedding in Australia.

- Camping and home-brews. Old cars and sweet sweet music. Sharing our journals and philosophies.

- This song: Everybody's Talkin' Harry Nillson.




On our twentieth anniversary we reminisced about:


- The baptism of their first child, my God daughter.

- The day I drove away from a painful relationship and how he just happened to be driving down the same road. That perfectly timed hug.

- The trials and triumphs of commitment and love.

- Introducing him to the Captain.

- More children

- Family holidays at the lake house. Euro Disney in Paris and the day our families sailed the most beautiful fjord in Denmark together.

- Our toast to remembering the past and making new memories.


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I'm happy to share Jeremiah with his wife... but I get jealous when the Captain gets to spend more time with him than I do... Jokes jokes - honestly I prefer the 'in vino veritas' chats with his wife, to catching fish with either of the men folk.

He's a dedicated parent and a devoted partner...it's no secret how much I love him, them, all of us.

The last time we met he said  "Our friendship feels like putting on your most comfortable pair of boots or slippers." Then he put another log on the fire, we poured four more glasses of spiced rum and started making plans for our next family holiday... Germany here we come.

On platonic relationships - do you believe men and women can truly be friends? How would you feel if your partners best friend was the opposite sex?


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Seriously I can't name him Jeremiah and not post this song. Starts singing *Jeremiah was a bullfrog*

He will be disappointed it's not "I am a hotdog" by Mabel





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10 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life - Let's call her...Ida. #atozchallenge



Ida can be pronounced 'Ee-da' or 'Eye-da' and I answer to either or either. 

I still feel awkward saying it sometimes, but I've always loved it. 


Some of the nicknames I got as a kid were Idaho potato, Ida spider, Idadoody, I'da thought...

I generally answered with, "I'dA know... if I've heard that one before!'

Ida, sweet as apple cider - is a song from early 1900's.  A lot of old men have sung "Ida sweet as apple cider, oh how idolise her, indeed I do" incredibly off key to me, for as long as I can remember.






Many cultures claim ownership of the origin of the name Ida


In 11 century Germany, Saint Ida the patron saint of brides and widows is credited with teaching, that physical unity in marriage reflects spiritual unities. 

In greek mythology the nymph Ida protected Zeus as a baby, and the constellation Two bears is named in her honour. 

In Indian medicine Ida is aligned with moon energy. It controls the mental processes, and sits at the base of the kundalini.

In hindu mythology Ida is an androgynous Goddess of earth and a granter of blessings.

King Ida in 6th century Britain was the founder of a line of Anglo saxon royalty.

In Norse mythology Ida is a place at the centre of Earth where the most important decisions of the Gods are made. 


Ida - an asteroid with a moon named Dactyl
image courtesy of NASA/Public Domain

Other interesting facts (even if your name isn't Ida):


Ida is the name of the first asteroid discovered with it's own moon

Ida is the nickname of a 47 million year old fossil that is linked to the evolution of primates.

Growing up in Australia I never knew another Ida. It stopped being a popular name in America about 100 years ago. In most of Scandinavia it is one of the top 10 most popular girls names. 
I have taught myself to not turn around every time I hear my name being called at the supermarket or public events, since I moved to Denmark. 

For as long as I can remember I have said 'The I in Ida is the God in me.'

I was named after my Italian Grandmother (who I never met) and my Mother says it means glad or happy. Would you name your daughter Ida or Ida?

Does the origin of your name fascinate you?  Have you googled it's meaning?


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9 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life - Let's call them...Hormonal teenagers #atozchallenge


Oddly enough it was around the time of puberty that I stopped chasing after boys I went to school with.  I was more interested in the posters of movie and pop stars covering my walls. 

I  was in the drama club, debating, a school council representative and captain of house sports. I was a high achieving good girl, that smoked in the toilets and often got sent home from school for wearing too much make-up.

At least once a month we would go to an underage disco.  If my parents knew how many boys I kissed at those police supervised events I would have been banned for life. It was a competitive sport amongst my friends. Anything more? Not a chance. I didn't want to be 'that' girl in the snide remarks and dirty talk of the school yard.

Some of the guys at school would mob the girls, at lunchtime. At first, it was harmless water fights.  Fun and games, until they started trying to pull our dresses off.  Fortunately the more we screamed, yelled and struggled, the faster they backed off. Even on the hottest days, we we wore t-shirts under our dresses and sports bloomers over our undies, a vain attempt to protect our modesty.

Like most of my friends I began thinking about Mr Right. We agreed it was out-dated to wait until we we married to lose our virginity.  We would, however, save ourselves for someone that we were truly in love with.  Someone we would be with forever. The One.

Cue the Summer holidays. "I met a boy cute as can be."




He was a year older, a musician who enrolled at my school after the Summer.  I had my friends he was making new friends. He was mature and never pressured me. During the Easter holidays he politely asked me to take our relationship to the next level.

I considered it, but a nagging feeling that I wasn't in love persisted. I knew he wasn't 'The One.' I broke up with him. Things would only get awkward if he kept asking.

I made some serious promises to myself that year.  Some I didn't keep, others I still maintain.  Like, only ever doing what I feel completely comfortable with.

I guess I love those hormonal teenagers because they taught me how to say "no thank you" to gentlemen with manners and roar at brutes who use force to try and cross my boundaries.

Did you fantasise about your first love being your sole/soulmate, your one and only?  Is this the reason why 'breaking up is never easy'?


8 April 2014

26 Greatest loves of my life - Let's call him...Geronimo. #atozchallenge



Geronimo was funny, co-ordinated and a sensitive 12 year old 'of distinction.' I couldn't let on that I liked him. I had already learned to keep my desires to myself.  He was even better at feigning disinterest than I was.

Our romance had a chance to develop when we both scored parts in in the chorus of Sweet Charity, one of our school's annual musicals. We had minor parts but all the cast and crew were expected to go on a weekend rehearsal camp.  Three days before the camp, Geronimo surprised me and asked me to be his girlfriend. Neither of us knew what to do after I said yes, but I couldn't wait to tell my friends.

I didn't see him again before we got on board the bus to go to camp. We sat apart. I thought he was avoiding me. We were the youngest cast members. We weren't as good at hiding our feelings as we thought.

On the first night of camp, some of the older girls told me he was waiting to see me behind the dormitory. I was terrified that he would try to kiss me. A real kiss.

Facing my fears. 26 Greatest loves of my life. #atozchallenge
Image courtesy of clker.com

It was so dark, we could barely see and neither of us remembered a torch.  I needed to blow my nose but was too scared to sniff.  He held my hand, it was sweating. We leant against the back of the building and I froze when I felt him get closer.  He missed my lips. I should have sniffed. It happened so fast.  My nose still dripping, I was too embarrassed to move and I didn't want to hurt his feelings.

He gave me a nice long hug, and I wiped my nose on my sleeve. We were afraid of getting caught, and I was afraid of what the older kids would imagine if we were gone to long. We said goodnight and I felt my way back to the front of the building.

Three months after the final show, I wasn't even sure we were together anymore. We never had classes together, never played together and apart from greeting each other 'good morning' and 'see ya tomorrow' every day, we hardly ever spoke.

My friends asked me why we never hung out together. I was sure he was going to drop me, so I got in first.  After I told him it was over he went back to class and smashed a window. Later, I told him I didn't think it would upset him so much and he should have told me how he really felt.  He didn't speak to me for the rest of the year.  I was happy when he found a new girlfriend.
26 Greatest loves of my life #atozchallenge
Image courtesy of clker.com



It never occured to me that he might have been waiting for me to talk to him first. Do you have a tendency to think the worst when you don't have all the facts? Have you got an embarrassing first kiss story?




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7 April 2014

26 Greatest Loves of my Life... Let's call him Father #atozchallenge

The Father of my childhood is different to the Father he is now.


We would hear his Station Wagon turning into our street and rush to have the table set while Mum finished preparing dinner, by 5pm every night.

- Now he prepares all the meals, chops things extra small, to accommodate his wife's weakened hands.




He used to wear his hand tailored suits everyday. When he wore his work overalls, he kept his shirt and tie on. Even when he mowed the lawns.

- Now he wears cardigans during the week, and t-shirts when he's at home.

With three daughters and a talkative wife, he never interrupted our conversations and we rarely included him in our girl talk.

- Now he answers the phone and records appointments on the calendar, we make sure we tell him everything.

He used to send us to the shops to buy his cartons of cigarettes.

- Now he does the grocery shopping and hasn't smoked in decades.

Some things will never change.


He still wakes up at half past five, every morning.

At 6am he starts tending to his garden. Nothing is ever wasted. He would be disappointed if he knew we sneak things into the rubbish.


He asks for nothing and shares everything he has. He offers the best of his produce to everyone else and takes what the birds have left for himself.

Mealtimes are 7am, 12pm and 6pm, but he'll wait hours if he knows your coming.

I have never heard him swear, burp or fart. 

He makes his own wine, but I've never seen him drunk. 

35 years have passed since he bought that station wagon and he still parks it under his bedroom window.


He's never mastered the English language, but he never fails to end a conversation with "tell me if you need something, I love you me my daughter."


Lessons from my Father


Just because a tailor spends his life working in a factory, doesn't mean he isn't a tailor.

Just because someone is quiet doesn't mean they're a drongo.

You don't have to speak the same language to show how much you love them.





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